Obligations

If there is one thing that I have learned this week, it is the fact that almost everything is easier to do if you're not obligated to do it.  The most obvious of these tasks, to me, is housework.  You see, Tuesdays are my reserved day for housework - this is when I clean the house and do laundry.  The funny thing about that is the fact that it is so hard for me to motivate myself to do the work even though I've set aside that specific day to get it done!

Another obligation I have a problem with is waking up early.  You see, during the week, when I'm helping the kids get ready for school, getting Colin ready for preschool or MOPs, or attending an early morning event (such as I did this morning when Colin and I went to Claire's DARE graduation at her school) I have such a hard time waking up and getting myself out of bed.  It's almost like my body is on strike against getting out of bed!  However, flip that shoe to the other foot and bring on a weekend and I find that I have no problem getting up early - it's the sleeping in that I have a problem with!

However, my most recent obligatory problem surprised me to the extreme.  You see, I have just had another appointment at my OBGYN for the fertility process that I've been undergoing (yes, I did say that I am done, but my being done starts after this round, as I already had my prescriptions at home).  The appointment went well, extremely well, in fact.  I think this is the first time in my fertility treatments that I have left the OB feeling happy and not mad at my doctor (which I informed him of as well!).  This past appointment I learned that I have an egg that is ready for ovulation and ready to be fertilized.  This is HUGE for me, as I haven't heard those words once since I began treatments.  So, I left the OB with a written prescription for Prometrium (which supplies my body with extra Progesterone) as well as instructions to, ah ... attempt to fertilize that egg for the next three nights.

I truly wasn't concerned, as this is an area that we don't struggle in at all.  However, I quickly learned that even the great parts of life, when they become an obligation, are oftentimes hard to do.  We're currently through two of the three nights and I have to admit that both of those nights were a struggle!  I now completely understand what women mean when they say that infertility completely imposes on the enjoyment factor in their intimate life!  Before this, Monte and I have never counted days, never had to know exactly when this and that were going to occur.  I have to say, I'm praying that this one is our ticket because I won't go through this for another round ... it just seems to be too much obligation and a lot less fun, and I'm ready for the fun part to come back!